Through the eyes of a child
It truly is amazing if you stop and think about life through the eyes of a child. They don’t lead with hate or prejudice or fear or worry. They just lead with their heart and that is a beautiful lesson for all of us to try to remember. Children are born pure and innocent. Life makes that all go away…
We were trying to figure out a way to tell our seven year old daughter about her sister wanting to become her brother. We bought two books that we thought would help. RED :: A Crayons Story by Michael Hall – is about a blue crayon mistakenly labeled a red crayon and how he suffers an identity crisis trying to figure out his true color. It is a cute book and geared toward younger children. We also bought I AM JAZZ by the amazing teen activist, Jazz Jennings, a transgender girl that is the face of trans youth.
We had been dropping little hints here and there about how sister is more like a boy and it never fazed our youngest, nor did it ever spark any conversation with her. So, a couple weeks ago, on a Saturday, we sat her down in her room and read her the crayon book. Afterwards, we asked if it reminded her of anyone. She had a hesitation about herself, as if she wanted to say something, but didn’t at first. So, we asked again and she said her sisters name with a question in her voice. We nodded and said yes, it does. Then, we read I AM JAZZ and afterwards asked the same question. Our daughter said it reminds her of her sister except the “opposite”. We said YES! You’re right. We talked briefly about how this is how sister feels and that we are going to start letting her be a boy and become her brother. It all just rolled off her shoulders with such ease that it was a breath of fresh air compared to telling her big sister. She asked about the new name we would call him and we said we didn’t know and that maybe she could ask herself. She skipped down the hall, opened sisters door and asked what the new name was going to be. They closed the door and went right back into playing together as if nothing ever happened.
My hubby was worried she didn’t really understand. A few hours later, we caught her reading the crayon book again by herself. Then, she read the Jazz book, again, by herself. I asked her if she had any questions and she said “No. I just like this book.” We figured it was her way of processing it all and we just let her be.
My hubby and I discussed how there is no preconceived notions for our little girl because she doesn’t know or understand the struggles and trials of being transgender. In her heart, her sister is the same person because she’s always thought of her as more a boy. The eyes of a child, the way they see the world is HOW the world really should be. It’s hurtful to know that one day, she will be broken down to the harsh realities of life and will learn what the struggles are for her brother. But, by then, she will be so well adjusted, that we can only hope she will be an advocate for her big brother and help spread kindness, awareness and understanding. If only we could all see through the eyes of a child…
❤︎ Just Parents